Like I'm Supposed to Remember That

When I first found my lipomas, I went to the hospital the next day. For all I knew, lumpy arms = something wrong with normal physical functioning. I didn't immediately assume "cancer" because I know the human body is so complicated that it could have simply been some benign reaction to raisins or Cyndi Lauper.

So I checked myself into the emergency room at St. Mary's Hospital and got the usual questionnaire quiz. One of the questions was, "Have you ever been here before?" I though back over all the other times I was sick and went to a hospital. I had an operation to insert a tube into my inner ear when I was little. It wasn't draining properly and I kept getting ear infections. That was at the Montreal Children's, though. I got a really bad flu once but I went to the Montreal General for that one. So, "Nope, never been here."

The lady at the desk punched in my data and said, "Ah, yes. You have been here before."

I was confused. Did their system mix me up with some other ill Montrealer?

"You were here as: Baby Boy Vincent."

Oh, yeah. I was born at St. Mary's.