12.09.2003

The sound of shuffling feet will only become more commonplace as years go by. The atrophy of the human body is well underway.

From Segways to Supermarkets, our need for physical vessels is being eroded, slowly but surely. We already have athletes being paid millions of dollars to perform great sporting feats so we don't have to. We have TV and the internet to keep our minds amused as our bodies dwindle to input devices. Perhaps a future generation with have a remote/keyboard/mouse implant? Can we perhaps invent the neural shunt sci-fi has promised us? We're already way behind on the jet pack and moon bases.

We used to need to be able to hunt tigers and gather berries. Then some lazy bastard got on a horse and said, "Walking is for chumps." Then some clever but movement-hating proto-human said, "Check this out: irrigation." Next came the chariot, the palanquin, aquaducts and theatre. Before you know it, clocks start showing up and people begin efficiently using their time so as to maximize their "not doing squat" time.

Nowadays we can't even be bothered with going to war. Why send 100,000 troops? Send 20 and arm them with a force multiplier of 50,000. We have cars, planes and boats. We have dinner-in-a-box (dinner-in-a-pill just doesn't have the same experience, but for some reason dinner-in-a-shake seems to be ok with a lot of people). We have enough drugs to make certain that our minds will go long before our bodies.

Why even bother? Just scoop out my non-motor-control neurons, slap it in some petri dish with nutri-gel, and hook up some electrodes. The red pill? Hell, we've been working on the blue pill for generations.